The Warrior Woman

Red Sonja seems like a third Conan movie, but it isn’t. Even though it was intended to be. Arnold Schwarzenegger plays a different sword wielding character with long hair named Kalidor. While newcomer Brigitte Nielsen plays the titular role of Red Sonja. Red Sonja is a character who made her debut appearance in a Conan the Barbarian Marvel comic in the 70’s. She was ranked #1 “Sexiest Woman in Comics” in a list by Comics Buyer’s Guide. It’s easy to see why, since she’s basically wearing a chainmail bikini. Unfortunately, the movie doesn’t use that outfit, but that’s only the first of many problems. Brigitte Nielsen cannot act at all. Aside from her being being tall, she doesn’t have any natural star power. Which is probably why she doesn’t get top billing. Although Arnold isn’t much better. You can tell he isn’t even trying here. It’s probably why Red Sonja is his biggest embarrassment. In fact, Arnold would even use it as a punishment for his kids if they misbehave. He would make them watch it 10 times (which sounds like torture). Red Sonja is badly acted, painfully generic, and features an annoying kid. The recipe for a bad action film. I’m not even sure what it was about other then it having something to do with kryptonite. Red Sonja leaves no impression whatsoever.

Red Sonja (right) fights Lord Kalidor (left)

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