Walk Like an Egyptian

Gods of Egypt is a cross between Clash of the Titans, Thor, The Mummy, 300, a video game, and an overblown CGI mess. I am so baffled by this movie’s existence. Gods of Egypt has honestly become one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. Rest assured it was a Razzie darling upon release. Gods of Egypt desperately tries to be the Egyptian mythology version of Clash of the Titans. The 3D and over reliance on CGI is the biggest proof of that. The difference is that apart from name recognition and overall appearance, I know next to nothing about Egyptian gods.

Gods of Egypt turns every god into 9 ft. tall giants with golden blood and their half-animal forms achieved with truly awful special effects. Anytime a god stands next to a mortal is just as awkward to see. The story follows the conflict between Horus and Set. Every Egyptian god or goddess is depicted including Thoth, Hathor, Ra, Osiris, Isis, Anubis, and Nephthys. The fictional mortal thief Bek and his lover Zaya are also included to ground the fantasy adventure. Even though Set pulling out Horus’ glowing eyes, encountering giant snakes, a riddle making sphinx, and their failed attempt at comedy will make it obvious that this isn’t historically accurate.

Along with the cast that was preemptively accused of whitewashing. Despite the inclusion of Chadwick Boseman and Élode Yung, the director publicly apologized for the decision. I’m not gonna act like the cast makes sense, but an obvious box-office bomb like this isn’t the place to get on a soap-box. Gods of Egypt feels like Thor since the comic book feel is unmistakable. The cast literally includes Robin, Elektra, Black Panther, Leonidas, and Tomar-Re. Although the primary god Horus is played by Jaime Lannister. The Mummy (1999) remains the most successful modern movie set in Egypt. Gods of Egypt is just embarrassing.

Gods of Egypt

Horus (god) lifts Bek (mortal)

6 thoughts on “Walk Like an Egyptian

  1. I hear ya, though the 9 ft. tall gods does make some sense. We have to remember that way-way back in the days of Ancient Egypt, the average height was about 5’6, 5’7, so anyone standing 6’2 or taller would definitely seem like a giant, and they have found evidence of some Egyptians suffering from Gigantism. 9 foot tall is stretching it just a little, but giants in the ancient world has some truth to it.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Around this time I was watching a ton of movies with good old Jamie Lannister. This was a step to far even for me 🙂 I did just rewatch the Mummy though… still the best of them!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s